I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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