They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
