if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
