you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
