My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
