super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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