Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
