Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
