I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
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