I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
