yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
it glows. i had to have it.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize