I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize
