real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
