saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
operation harelip BJ is a go
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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