im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
