But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize