But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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