Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Randomize