Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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