found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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