you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize