I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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