I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize