You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Randomize
