hell yes lets make some ravioli
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
