We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
