Redeem this text for a blowjob
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Randomize
