Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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