I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
We need to get me chipped asap
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
