He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
