So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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