Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize