Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just want nice things and good sex
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
