he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
