So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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