Christians are straight up FREAKS
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize