his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
