can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It was like giving head to a cactus.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
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