Girls should come with a carfax report
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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