Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
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