Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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