why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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