We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
