i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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