Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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