i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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