Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
