direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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