I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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