dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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