guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
