So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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